Evil lives in my town...
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Grey balls and a stormy outlook
Ah, week four of school is over, and it's into week 5. One month down, 10 more to go. For this year anyway.
Week four was brilliant. Monday was a national holiday (the day I came back from Osaka) and Thursday was a national holiday. So only 3 days of school. Don't get me wrong, I am enjoying school, but I also like to sleep, and I don't seem to have enough time for that with all these boozy nights out.
Tuesday was a fairly quiet day at school. At Junior High School I am often only involved in one lesson per day, so I spend a lot of time attempting to learn Japanese (and failing). I was still getting worked up though because I had elementary school on Wednesday and needed to prepare after school, but I couldn't because we had our first English Conversation Class in the evening. This was really good- held in a shop on one of the old fashioned streets- and about 12 locals came, all with varying levels of ability and confidence. Plus, two of my Junior High School girls came as well, such is their keen-ness to progress! They all brought food and the class was a welcome party for Christine and me! This town is so nice. Anyway, got a lift home in the rain and thought a lot more about elementary school in the morning. And didn't do anything about it. Oops.
So on wednesday I got a lift to school from one of the teachers who happens to live in my building- very handy as the school's a 30 minute drive away. Immediately upon arrival I began to draw things and download pictures from the internet and then held a very successful lesson where the children learned the names of vegetables, the numbers 11-20 and the names of sports.
The day continued to be a success as I found not only a sport I was good at, but players whose skills I could match. That the sport was ping pong and the players aged 6-12 is really of no importance, and actually quite insignificant I'm sure you'll agree... I took part in the after school club, which actually wasn't after school, as they just shorten the school day so that the kids can go and leave at a decent hour. Makes sense to me.
Thursday was a day of rest and so I didn't get up till around 10, and didn't get dressed till 12. I thought, ooh I'll get some money out and I'll go and pay my bills at Lawson (yes, bills come with bar codes on and you can pay them at the till of selected convenience stores). D'oh! The cash machine was closed. All three cash machines in my town were closed. Hot damn! And while this alarmed me, the sight of my school kids in their school uniforms alarmed me even more. It's a holiday! No school!
Well, it was onto the train to Kuse to meet Johanna for lunch (revolving sushi, mmm), a spot of shopping, and then a trip to the video shop, where Johanna completed her membership and then wandered down one of the aisles as if she owned the place. Except she obviously didn't as she didn't see the over 18s only sign and walked straight into the porno section. The screaming could be heard for miles, as could my laughter, and the laughter of the guys behind the counter. Eventually we rented Matrix Revolutions and some American film I'd never heard of. We decided to enjoy with snacks and stopped off at an odd little shop on the way. I obviously left my principles in my wardrobe in Ilford as I found myself buying a Nestle kitkat, amongst other things. It was such a success. The American film was on DVD and wouldn't play in Johanna's PC. Wrong region. Johanna's snack of chipsticks turned out to be sugar coated. Straight in the bin. Matrix Revolutions was on video and it worked -hooray!- but it was dubbed in Japanese. We watched it anyway. And finally I opened mt last pack of sweets to find compressed candy floss. It was like eating a grape flavoured tampon. More for the bin.
By the end of the Matrix we were clearly delirious and after having tea and watching some more bizarre Japanese telly, I shuffled home to bed.
Friday was a normal day at school, but the night was a big one. RayVon and her friend Ruth and Ab Slance (Abby) all came to visit. We met Christine and Jeremy and drank at Kats bar. Our friends, the owners, weren't there, but the girl from Lawson's was behind the bar. 2 jobs in a one horse town. We'd had plenty of drinks by the time some locals came in, and realised it was time to go when one of them made a successful grab for Jeremy's manhood. So we ran to the karaoke where everyone sang badly but I wasn't allowed to sing 'Gloria' by Laura Branigan. Damn that cancel button. From there we headed to Kuse, losing Christine and Jeremy on the way, and carrying out a full scale drunken assault on Lawson's on the way. But the Outback bar was closed! I have recollections of banging on the door 'cause there was noise inside, but we weren't allowed in. Hot damn! (part 2). So we went back to Johanna's where I passed out.
Saturday was a blur of not sleeping, watching TV, eating (constantly) and with a spot of shopping thrown in for good measure. And an early night.
Sunday morning I awoke at 9, and it was fortunate that I did so as the postman was at the door at 9:30 am delivering a battered packiage of germolene and teabags from my Ma. On a Sunday? Are you mad sir? Johanna came round and for a change I cooked for her, a nice curry, having found garam masala and chilli powder in the local supermarket. It was another night of not much sleep as I worried about the new schools I was staring this week...
Monday was great. A new Junior high, where I had to introduce myself in front of the kids (I hadn't expected to) and I spoke quickly enough so that no one noticed mistakes. From there it was straight into the four classes I had to do. The kids were cool, funny and lively and I think I have perfected the art of being an imbecile. Pull a face every time something goes wrong (ie all the time) and o everything like you know it's stupid. And have a bum chin. It's a saving grace with kids over here.
Tuesday was the same, a busy day packed with classes and kids going wild! I only played an actual game with one class, and the other four I had practising 'I like ... and ...' with animals, sports and food, and they all really enjoyed it. I know 'cause they said so. Yay! At the begining of each class I had to sing an atrocious 'hello' song, and it truly is atrocious. However, it's even more atrocious when you're acting like a Butlin's red-coat on acid using more hand signals than a driver with road rage.
At elementary schools you get given school lunch. And it's strange. On Monday we had 3 dishes, one of which was potato salad with ham (!) and kiwi fruit (!!). Nice it wasn't. On Tuesday it was 3 dishes, one of which was meat, so I wouldn't eat it, and the other was a bowl of soup with squidgy white things, spring onion and balls of grey. Apparently these were fish. They tasted strange. I was desperate for food so had to eat them.
As it was Tuesday night, it was English conversation class and we bluffed our way through. I think next week we'll have to prepare a bit more. I did learn though that those purdy red flaaahs are called cluster amarylliseseses. Or at least that's the translation of the Japanese.
Oh and guess what happened today? Typhoon. Again. They're getting boring now. I ran out of chocolate at 8 and it's not safe to go to Bonnie's. Hot damn! (part 3).
Week four was brilliant. Monday was a national holiday (the day I came back from Osaka) and Thursday was a national holiday. So only 3 days of school. Don't get me wrong, I am enjoying school, but I also like to sleep, and I don't seem to have enough time for that with all these boozy nights out.
Tuesday was a fairly quiet day at school. At Junior High School I am often only involved in one lesson per day, so I spend a lot of time attempting to learn Japanese (and failing). I was still getting worked up though because I had elementary school on Wednesday and needed to prepare after school, but I couldn't because we had our first English Conversation Class in the evening. This was really good- held in a shop on one of the old fashioned streets- and about 12 locals came, all with varying levels of ability and confidence. Plus, two of my Junior High School girls came as well, such is their keen-ness to progress! They all brought food and the class was a welcome party for Christine and me! This town is so nice. Anyway, got a lift home in the rain and thought a lot more about elementary school in the morning. And didn't do anything about it. Oops.
So on wednesday I got a lift to school from one of the teachers who happens to live in my building- very handy as the school's a 30 minute drive away. Immediately upon arrival I began to draw things and download pictures from the internet and then held a very successful lesson where the children learned the names of vegetables, the numbers 11-20 and the names of sports.
The day continued to be a success as I found not only a sport I was good at, but players whose skills I could match. That the sport was ping pong and the players aged 6-12 is really of no importance, and actually quite insignificant I'm sure you'll agree... I took part in the after school club, which actually wasn't after school, as they just shorten the school day so that the kids can go and leave at a decent hour. Makes sense to me.
Thursday was a day of rest and so I didn't get up till around 10, and didn't get dressed till 12. I thought, ooh I'll get some money out and I'll go and pay my bills at Lawson (yes, bills come with bar codes on and you can pay them at the till of selected convenience stores). D'oh! The cash machine was closed. All three cash machines in my town were closed. Hot damn! And while this alarmed me, the sight of my school kids in their school uniforms alarmed me even more. It's a holiday! No school!
Well, it was onto the train to Kuse to meet Johanna for lunch (revolving sushi, mmm), a spot of shopping, and then a trip to the video shop, where Johanna completed her membership and then wandered down one of the aisles as if she owned the place. Except she obviously didn't as she didn't see the over 18s only sign and walked straight into the porno section. The screaming could be heard for miles, as could my laughter, and the laughter of the guys behind the counter. Eventually we rented Matrix Revolutions and some American film I'd never heard of. We decided to enjoy with snacks and stopped off at an odd little shop on the way. I obviously left my principles in my wardrobe in Ilford as I found myself buying a Nestle kitkat, amongst other things. It was such a success. The American film was on DVD and wouldn't play in Johanna's PC. Wrong region. Johanna's snack of chipsticks turned out to be sugar coated. Straight in the bin. Matrix Revolutions was on video and it worked -hooray!- but it was dubbed in Japanese. We watched it anyway. And finally I opened mt last pack of sweets to find compressed candy floss. It was like eating a grape flavoured tampon. More for the bin.
By the end of the Matrix we were clearly delirious and after having tea and watching some more bizarre Japanese telly, I shuffled home to bed.
Friday was a normal day at school, but the night was a big one. RayVon and her friend Ruth and Ab Slance (Abby) all came to visit. We met Christine and Jeremy and drank at Kats bar. Our friends, the owners, weren't there, but the girl from Lawson's was behind the bar. 2 jobs in a one horse town. We'd had plenty of drinks by the time some locals came in, and realised it was time to go when one of them made a successful grab for Jeremy's manhood. So we ran to the karaoke where everyone sang badly but I wasn't allowed to sing 'Gloria' by Laura Branigan. Damn that cancel button. From there we headed to Kuse, losing Christine and Jeremy on the way, and carrying out a full scale drunken assault on Lawson's on the way. But the Outback bar was closed! I have recollections of banging on the door 'cause there was noise inside, but we weren't allowed in. Hot damn! (part 2). So we went back to Johanna's where I passed out.
Saturday was a blur of not sleeping, watching TV, eating (constantly) and with a spot of shopping thrown in for good measure. And an early night.
Sunday morning I awoke at 9, and it was fortunate that I did so as the postman was at the door at 9:30 am delivering a battered packiage of germolene and teabags from my Ma. On a Sunday? Are you mad sir? Johanna came round and for a change I cooked for her, a nice curry, having found garam masala and chilli powder in the local supermarket. It was another night of not much sleep as I worried about the new schools I was staring this week...
Monday was great. A new Junior high, where I had to introduce myself in front of the kids (I hadn't expected to) and I spoke quickly enough so that no one noticed mistakes. From there it was straight into the four classes I had to do. The kids were cool, funny and lively and I think I have perfected the art of being an imbecile. Pull a face every time something goes wrong (ie all the time) and o everything like you know it's stupid. And have a bum chin. It's a saving grace with kids over here.
Tuesday was the same, a busy day packed with classes and kids going wild! I only played an actual game with one class, and the other four I had practising 'I like ... and ...' with animals, sports and food, and they all really enjoyed it. I know 'cause they said so. Yay! At the begining of each class I had to sing an atrocious 'hello' song, and it truly is atrocious. However, it's even more atrocious when you're acting like a Butlin's red-coat on acid using more hand signals than a driver with road rage.
At elementary schools you get given school lunch. And it's strange. On Monday we had 3 dishes, one of which was potato salad with ham (!) and kiwi fruit (!!). Nice it wasn't. On Tuesday it was 3 dishes, one of which was meat, so I wouldn't eat it, and the other was a bowl of soup with squidgy white things, spring onion and balls of grey. Apparently these were fish. They tasted strange. I was desperate for food so had to eat them.
As it was Tuesday night, it was English conversation class and we bluffed our way through. I think next week we'll have to prepare a bit more. I did learn though that those purdy red flaaahs are called cluster amarylliseseses. Or at least that's the translation of the Japanese.
Oh and guess what happened today? Typhoon. Again. They're getting boring now. I ran out of chocolate at 8 and it's not safe to go to Bonnie's. Hot damn! (part 3).
Monday, September 27, 2004
Monday, September 20, 2004
Bang Bang Chicken
OK, so picture this. You walk into a hall full of children dressed in dark blue robes with metal grills on their faces and hoods on their heads and they are hitting each other. With sticks. Have I walked into a horror movie? No, it's my new hobby- Kendo. Only I wasn't expecting it to be full of pre teens with a blood lust and a list of questions for the foriegner. The best question was "are you a man?" OK, so I was wearing black and white Kendo robes (everyone else had navy blue, even the girls) and had beautiful hair, but clearly I was a male of the species. In body if not in spirit at least. I also wasn't expecting to spend over half an hour putting on robes and costume and while doing so managing to do it ridiculously wrong and insult every Kendo player there has ever been (but really, if you have so many rules for tying a bow in a piece of string, a stupid foriegner is going to get it wrong, right?) Anyway, it was fun. Until it got bizarre and I had to hit my supervisor over the head. I'm not used to such violence. Although by Wednesday night I was perfectly well accustomed to it, and was proper battering him with my stick. I shall demonstrate on drunken victims when I return to England. Broken noses ahoy!
Thursday night was a bit of an accident. I'd bumped into Christine on Wednesday and she seemed to quite keen to get together and go for dinner so she could show off her boyfriend who'd just flown in from the States. Well, we met on Thursday and ate a feast of sashimi, tofu, salad and they ate meaty stuff. And we had a quiet couple of drinks. On to Ai chan's bar where we continued to drink, although we had a time limit. Johanna was going to get the last train home (8:30- this isn't London). Only she decided to enjoy her kast drink and get a cab instead. And then some locals came and joined us. And started buying us drinks. Christine was already smashed and wanted to go home. Jeremy (her boyfriend) didn't want to drink anymore 'I'm drinking whisky!' I replied, 'so? I'm drinking gin and tonic', to which he said, 'yeah, but I'm drinking straight whiskey'. The conversation ended with, 'yeah, well I'm not stopping and I have school tomorrow'. It was one of those statements that sounds vaguely cool but moreso just stupid. And with Christine and Jeremy gone, we drank into the night. And boy did we drink. We went to sit with the locals, who kept buying us drinks, and then they announced that they owned a bar next to the karaoke parlour and that we should go. So we did. We drank till midnight. Six hours of drinking on a school night. Ooh we are naughty...
So I woke up on Friday still drunk, and I had to teach at school and the I had to rush home and pack for Osaka. It was a bit of a mess really. Johanna and I promised each other we'd sleep on the bus, but that was never going to happen, so we gabbed all the way, and met RayVon and Fiona, and eventually Saddam (Sarah) in Okayama. Johanna and Saddam were going on an organised trip to climb Fuji which involved overnight travelling on a coach, no reasonable amounts of sleep and having to be tired with people you don't know. Fiona and RayVon and I were going on a trip to Osaka which involved eating, shopping, sleeping in a nice air conditioned hotel room and not having to talk to anyone but each other. It was cool. We took the bullet train and I remembered my way round from last time. We were very excited about how cheap the bullet train was until it turned out we'd only bought half the ticket and it was twice the price. Hot damn! But it was worth it- £25 each way. We wandered round Shitennoji temple- the oldest government built temple in Japan (or something) which was really nice, and then wandered round the grounds of Osaka castle and then checked in. The nightime involved shopping and eating Italian food (Japanese would have been too dificult as Fiona hates fish and I hate meat). Only, the Italian was almost too difficult as the katakana menu made me cross eyed and I lost the ability to function. The restaurant staff were so nice though and when we asked where a nearby cinema was, they spent 10 minutes drawing us a map. And then we didn't go anyway. Oops.
On Sunday the ladies went to Universal Studios Osaka, and I wandered round the town on my own. Osaka is a cool city, but so busy. People are crammed everywhere. It's not for the claustrophobe. Or for the homosexual it would seem. Osaka has supposedly the second biggest gay scene in Japan, outside of Tokyo. You wouldn't tell. I spent ages wandering round what appeared to be a red light district trying to find it and then realised it was mingled in among the stripper joints and hostess bars. Nice. So I went back to the shops and continued my Japanese cultural experience by going to Starbucks. The taste of home. Indeed, the taste of nowhere in particular because they're flaming everywhere. I half expected Johanna and Saddam to report that Starbucks were on top of Mount Fuji...
By 6:15 my feet had decided they'd had enough, and I sat down in the street and took off my shoes only to find my feet bleeding and blistered. Purdy. So I ventured back to the hotel and when the girls returned we went for dinner. Pizza, again. But we were delirious by the time we got to eat, so the conversation was bizarre and vulgar, and a whole lot more. And we found a shop that consisted of vending machines that sold hard-core adult movies and literature. Unstaffed of course, and open for anyone of any age to enter. Except that at this is Japan, only people of appropriate age and foriegners will go in. So we went in and took photos with our camera phones.
Today was good. We finished out Osaka trip by shopping. Fiona bought some books and tried on boots that didn't fit. RayVon bought some books and saw a gorgeous coat to buy, but it was equivalent to £250, so she said no. I bought grey and purple trainers. They're ace.
We got the bullet train, having bought our tickets from a person and not a machine this time, and arrived back in Okayama in time for me to get the early bus and get home by 6. So now I'm off to bed to prepare for another week.
Spare a thought for poor Sparky, my psycho dog, who was put to sleep this week. Bye bye Sparky. I hope you can read weblogs wherever you are.
Thursday night was a bit of an accident. I'd bumped into Christine on Wednesday and she seemed to quite keen to get together and go for dinner so she could show off her boyfriend who'd just flown in from the States. Well, we met on Thursday and ate a feast of sashimi, tofu, salad and they ate meaty stuff. And we had a quiet couple of drinks. On to Ai chan's bar where we continued to drink, although we had a time limit. Johanna was going to get the last train home (8:30- this isn't London). Only she decided to enjoy her kast drink and get a cab instead. And then some locals came and joined us. And started buying us drinks. Christine was already smashed and wanted to go home. Jeremy (her boyfriend) didn't want to drink anymore 'I'm drinking whisky!' I replied, 'so? I'm drinking gin and tonic', to which he said, 'yeah, but I'm drinking straight whiskey'. The conversation ended with, 'yeah, well I'm not stopping and I have school tomorrow'. It was one of those statements that sounds vaguely cool but moreso just stupid. And with Christine and Jeremy gone, we drank into the night. And boy did we drink. We went to sit with the locals, who kept buying us drinks, and then they announced that they owned a bar next to the karaoke parlour and that we should go. So we did. We drank till midnight. Six hours of drinking on a school night. Ooh we are naughty...
So I woke up on Friday still drunk, and I had to teach at school and the I had to rush home and pack for Osaka. It was a bit of a mess really. Johanna and I promised each other we'd sleep on the bus, but that was never going to happen, so we gabbed all the way, and met RayVon and Fiona, and eventually Saddam (Sarah) in Okayama. Johanna and Saddam were going on an organised trip to climb Fuji which involved overnight travelling on a coach, no reasonable amounts of sleep and having to be tired with people you don't know. Fiona and RayVon and I were going on a trip to Osaka which involved eating, shopping, sleeping in a nice air conditioned hotel room and not having to talk to anyone but each other. It was cool. We took the bullet train and I remembered my way round from last time. We were very excited about how cheap the bullet train was until it turned out we'd only bought half the ticket and it was twice the price. Hot damn! But it was worth it- £25 each way. We wandered round Shitennoji temple- the oldest government built temple in Japan (or something) which was really nice, and then wandered round the grounds of Osaka castle and then checked in. The nightime involved shopping and eating Italian food (Japanese would have been too dificult as Fiona hates fish and I hate meat). Only, the Italian was almost too difficult as the katakana menu made me cross eyed and I lost the ability to function. The restaurant staff were so nice though and when we asked where a nearby cinema was, they spent 10 minutes drawing us a map. And then we didn't go anyway. Oops.
On Sunday the ladies went to Universal Studios Osaka, and I wandered round the town on my own. Osaka is a cool city, but so busy. People are crammed everywhere. It's not for the claustrophobe. Or for the homosexual it would seem. Osaka has supposedly the second biggest gay scene in Japan, outside of Tokyo. You wouldn't tell. I spent ages wandering round what appeared to be a red light district trying to find it and then realised it was mingled in among the stripper joints and hostess bars. Nice. So I went back to the shops and continued my Japanese cultural experience by going to Starbucks. The taste of home. Indeed, the taste of nowhere in particular because they're flaming everywhere. I half expected Johanna and Saddam to report that Starbucks were on top of Mount Fuji...
By 6:15 my feet had decided they'd had enough, and I sat down in the street and took off my shoes only to find my feet bleeding and blistered. Purdy. So I ventured back to the hotel and when the girls returned we went for dinner. Pizza, again. But we were delirious by the time we got to eat, so the conversation was bizarre and vulgar, and a whole lot more. And we found a shop that consisted of vending machines that sold hard-core adult movies and literature. Unstaffed of course, and open for anyone of any age to enter. Except that at this is Japan, only people of appropriate age and foriegners will go in. So we went in and took photos with our camera phones.
Today was good. We finished out Osaka trip by shopping. Fiona bought some books and tried on boots that didn't fit. RayVon bought some books and saw a gorgeous coat to buy, but it was equivalent to £250, so she said no. I bought grey and purple trainers. They're ace.
We got the bullet train, having bought our tickets from a person and not a machine this time, and arrived back in Okayama in time for me to get the early bus and get home by 6. So now I'm off to bed to prepare for another week.
Spare a thought for poor Sparky, my psycho dog, who was put to sleep this week. Bye bye Sparky. I hope you can read weblogs wherever you are.
Sunday, September 12, 2004
Mick Jagger
This is my new look. At my enkai, the teachers told me I looked like Mick Jagger. I don't think this is a good thing as last week I looked like Tom Cruise. But soft hair is better than sharp hair, and who am I to look a gift horse (that you paid for) in the mouth. Or something.
And these purdy (pretty) flaaahs (flowers) have popped up all over town. They're real purdy.
And these purdy (pretty) flaaahs (flowers) have popped up all over town. They're real purdy.
More more more, how do you like it? How do you like it?
Not very much that's for sure.
Monday this week was a mess. I seemed to lose the ability to keep my eyes open and this was at it's worst during school hours. I could say it was because of the three earthquakes on Sunday evening/ Monday morning, but I slept through them all. I could say it was because I was tired from over exertion, but the only things I've over exerted recently are my two typing fingers. Very sore they are. Anyway, it was a pretty quiet day, did the self introduction a couple of times with the third year classes at Junior high, and they were cool. They think I look like Tom Cruise. I love school children.
Tuesday was typhoon number 2, and it was due to hit Katsuyama at noon. So, I thought with glee, a day in bed for me! Not bloody likely. I get the same phone call as before and have to hall arse into school, where I find no-one doing anything. A few teachers were catching up on things, but some appeared to have caught up, and were catching up on computer games and newspaper bargain shopping pull-outs instead (and this included the headmaster). In my tired state I became more and more irritable and angry about having to sit in an office with nothing to do other try and not pass out at my desk. This anger grew even more once the typhoon kicked in and it wasn't safe to leave the building. Although somehow a man turned up at the school doors selling bread in the middle of the storm (!?). He had what appeared to be lovely stick bread, so that momentarily brightened me up and I bought a loaf.
At 4 o'clock our deputy head announced we could leave early. I was not hugely impressed as 4 is the time I finish and the rain was pelting down by now. Sideways in sheet formation. So, I left to walk home having not ridden my bike due to the weather. Within 500 yards of the school I was soaked through, so I decided to head to Lawson's to get a plastic bag for my bread, only I got confused and asked the shop girl for a big desk instead. Doh! (part 50,007). And when I got home, said loaf appeared to have a faux-creamy filling. Doh! (part 50,008).
Wednesday was better, and the tiredness seemed to peak. Only one class at school, and then I went for tea with the elementary school headmistress' daughter and her husband. It was really good. her English is perfect, and he was very funny. I'd been for lunch with her before when she was preparing for teaching exams as she wanted to practice her English. She didn't need to practice...
Thursday was a real trial. I had to watch rehearsals for school sports day, and sit in the heat outside without falling asleep. I couldn't read a book or send text messages or learn Japanese as usual. Hot damn! Still, the evening made up for it as I got my hair straightened Japanese style for an amzing equivalent £50UK. It was 10000 yen. And it's wonderful. It moves when the wind blows, and it takes hours and hours to dry, just like real hair! I am in love.
Friday was business as usual, with two classes, both were cool, and after work we went out for Christine's birthday. Abbey came over from Shingo Town, and me, she, Christine and Johanna went to a restaurant which was real nice, but the 50 year old waitresses were on crack or something. They were in a different world for the whole time we were there, and they made wicked drinks. Johanna's rum and coke was equal parts rum and coke. We will return. Hopefully at a time when our Japanese has improved so that we can order properly rather than just randomly select from the menu.
From there we went back to the Outback bar in Kuse, and was greeted with a chorus of 'Kurisu' by someone I introduced myself to a few weeks ago (I remember because his teeth were shocking) and his posse of friends. This led to drinking games with two of the guys, one of whom kept talking to me, but I he was drunk and I can't understand Japanese these days, so I was clueless (as usual). Games of Janken Po (Japanese Paper, Scissors, Rock game) decided who would drink shots of vodka. Christine and I made an early exit- I had sports day on Saturday and I was drunk from the restaurant...
Well, Saturday came, and I was hungover. Not too bad though, not friends-with-the-toilet bowl bad. Just a headache. And I had to run in a race. So, to school for 8:20 as usual, and then onwards to undokai as they call it. It was very like our sports days, with tug of war and games involving pushing a bicycle wheel around the track with a stick. Teachers had teams in certain races and unflinchingly came last every single time. This went over my head as I became psycho boy, convinced that I could win my race as all the teams had fat kids in who wouldn't run fast. Only, once our relay started I realised that fat kids can run faster than fat adults and, despite some strong athletic turns on our team, we really stood no chance. But I was fast. Damn fast. Or so I was told by the teachers and the kids afterwards. Although these are the people who are amazed that I can eat food with chopsticks, so perhaps it was my being faster than a corpse that surprised them. Who knows?
As sports day came to a close we started to prepare for teacher's night out. We had our enkai in a restaurant in Kuse, and imbued with alcohol and an iron will, we re-enacted the games from sports day with a few props and a lot of booze. The head and deputy head of the school threw themselves into things without abandon, and the whole thing was a right laugh. Everyone drank like the pubs were closing in ten minutes, although we had a huge (and I mean huge) supply of booze and it was only 6 o'clock. A massive amount of food was laid out and the school secretary impressed me hugely by refusing to eat some sort of shellfish, and when I asked her if she liked it, she said 'grotesque'. This was the first English word she'd spoken to me, and lord, her timing was perfect. I was a bit drunk, and proceeded to laugh maniacally. Not as much as during the games we played, or when we redid the kids' dance routines which they'd performed in the day. Class.
After the main meal, we went on to another bar which had karaoke. At first only 3 of us went on, then my favourite teacher (who leaves at the end of this month) turned up- she is a shocking drinker, and likes the drinks I do. I think we'll stay in touch. I sang Abba which was very well received, and then, by accident, 'The Eye Of The Tiger'. Which is just really a load of rubbish, in't it? Anyway, more teachers joined us, but before they settled in, they conga-ed into the bar with their tops off, and then conga-ed out again. Then they repeated this in only their underpants. I was rather dismayed to say the least. More drinks were had, and then it was decided we should leave. This bar had plates of snack food on the tables (Japanese seaweed crackers, chocolates, soft cheese). The deputy head decided that I should have these, and together with my favourite teacher, proceeded to fill my bag with goodies which I ate for breakfast. I stumbled back into my flat in an alcoholic daze with the intent of cleaning and tidying today, but other than a two hour walk round town where I discovered 'culture' again (and photographed every little bit I saw), I haven't done anything at all.
Monday this week was a mess. I seemed to lose the ability to keep my eyes open and this was at it's worst during school hours. I could say it was because of the three earthquakes on Sunday evening/ Monday morning, but I slept through them all. I could say it was because I was tired from over exertion, but the only things I've over exerted recently are my two typing fingers. Very sore they are. Anyway, it was a pretty quiet day, did the self introduction a couple of times with the third year classes at Junior high, and they were cool. They think I look like Tom Cruise. I love school children.
Tuesday was typhoon number 2, and it was due to hit Katsuyama at noon. So, I thought with glee, a day in bed for me! Not bloody likely. I get the same phone call as before and have to hall arse into school, where I find no-one doing anything. A few teachers were catching up on things, but some appeared to have caught up, and were catching up on computer games and newspaper bargain shopping pull-outs instead (and this included the headmaster). In my tired state I became more and more irritable and angry about having to sit in an office with nothing to do other try and not pass out at my desk. This anger grew even more once the typhoon kicked in and it wasn't safe to leave the building. Although somehow a man turned up at the school doors selling bread in the middle of the storm (!?). He had what appeared to be lovely stick bread, so that momentarily brightened me up and I bought a loaf.
At 4 o'clock our deputy head announced we could leave early. I was not hugely impressed as 4 is the time I finish and the rain was pelting down by now. Sideways in sheet formation. So, I left to walk home having not ridden my bike due to the weather. Within 500 yards of the school I was soaked through, so I decided to head to Lawson's to get a plastic bag for my bread, only I got confused and asked the shop girl for a big desk instead. Doh! (part 50,007). And when I got home, said loaf appeared to have a faux-creamy filling. Doh! (part 50,008).
Wednesday was better, and the tiredness seemed to peak. Only one class at school, and then I went for tea with the elementary school headmistress' daughter and her husband. It was really good. her English is perfect, and he was very funny. I'd been for lunch with her before when she was preparing for teaching exams as she wanted to practice her English. She didn't need to practice...
Thursday was a real trial. I had to watch rehearsals for school sports day, and sit in the heat outside without falling asleep. I couldn't read a book or send text messages or learn Japanese as usual. Hot damn! Still, the evening made up for it as I got my hair straightened Japanese style for an amzing equivalent £50UK. It was 10000 yen. And it's wonderful. It moves when the wind blows, and it takes hours and hours to dry, just like real hair! I am in love.
Friday was business as usual, with two classes, both were cool, and after work we went out for Christine's birthday. Abbey came over from Shingo Town, and me, she, Christine and Johanna went to a restaurant which was real nice, but the 50 year old waitresses were on crack or something. They were in a different world for the whole time we were there, and they made wicked drinks. Johanna's rum and coke was equal parts rum and coke. We will return. Hopefully at a time when our Japanese has improved so that we can order properly rather than just randomly select from the menu.
From there we went back to the Outback bar in Kuse, and was greeted with a chorus of 'Kurisu' by someone I introduced myself to a few weeks ago (I remember because his teeth were shocking) and his posse of friends. This led to drinking games with two of the guys, one of whom kept talking to me, but I he was drunk and I can't understand Japanese these days, so I was clueless (as usual). Games of Janken Po (Japanese Paper, Scissors, Rock game) decided who would drink shots of vodka. Christine and I made an early exit- I had sports day on Saturday and I was drunk from the restaurant...
Well, Saturday came, and I was hungover. Not too bad though, not friends-with-the-toilet bowl bad. Just a headache. And I had to run in a race. So, to school for 8:20 as usual, and then onwards to undokai as they call it. It was very like our sports days, with tug of war and games involving pushing a bicycle wheel around the track with a stick. Teachers had teams in certain races and unflinchingly came last every single time. This went over my head as I became psycho boy, convinced that I could win my race as all the teams had fat kids in who wouldn't run fast. Only, once our relay started I realised that fat kids can run faster than fat adults and, despite some strong athletic turns on our team, we really stood no chance. But I was fast. Damn fast. Or so I was told by the teachers and the kids afterwards. Although these are the people who are amazed that I can eat food with chopsticks, so perhaps it was my being faster than a corpse that surprised them. Who knows?
As sports day came to a close we started to prepare for teacher's night out. We had our enkai in a restaurant in Kuse, and imbued with alcohol and an iron will, we re-enacted the games from sports day with a few props and a lot of booze. The head and deputy head of the school threw themselves into things without abandon, and the whole thing was a right laugh. Everyone drank like the pubs were closing in ten minutes, although we had a huge (and I mean huge) supply of booze and it was only 6 o'clock. A massive amount of food was laid out and the school secretary impressed me hugely by refusing to eat some sort of shellfish, and when I asked her if she liked it, she said 'grotesque'. This was the first English word she'd spoken to me, and lord, her timing was perfect. I was a bit drunk, and proceeded to laugh maniacally. Not as much as during the games we played, or when we redid the kids' dance routines which they'd performed in the day. Class.
After the main meal, we went on to another bar which had karaoke. At first only 3 of us went on, then my favourite teacher (who leaves at the end of this month) turned up- she is a shocking drinker, and likes the drinks I do. I think we'll stay in touch. I sang Abba which was very well received, and then, by accident, 'The Eye Of The Tiger'. Which is just really a load of rubbish, in't it? Anyway, more teachers joined us, but before they settled in, they conga-ed into the bar with their tops off, and then conga-ed out again. Then they repeated this in only their underpants. I was rather dismayed to say the least. More drinks were had, and then it was decided we should leave. This bar had plates of snack food on the tables (Japanese seaweed crackers, chocolates, soft cheese). The deputy head decided that I should have these, and together with my favourite teacher, proceeded to fill my bag with goodies which I ate for breakfast. I stumbled back into my flat in an alcoholic daze with the intent of cleaning and tidying today, but other than a two hour walk round town where I discovered 'culture' again (and photographed every little bit I saw), I haven't done anything at all.
Sunday, September 05, 2004
In with the new and in with the new.
Here is the day by day run down of this weeks activities/ events:
Monday 30th August 2004
Typhoon hits Katsuyama. I receive a phone call at 7:25 am to say that the kids aren't going to school because of the typhoon, but we teachers are because we have our work to do. Damn. Well, I get to school with my prepared speech, and myself and the other two new teachers introduce ourselves to the other staff. I attempt to speak in Japanese and end up telling the staff that I was a nurse in a study in London (?!), but the staff was too polite to say anything. At lunchtime they were amazed because a) I had cooked rice and b) I had done it in a rice cooker and c) I could eat it with chopsticks, which really is amazing.
We left work early for safety reasons, and one of the English teachers advised me that it would be dangerous to ride my bike in the typhoon. I informed her that it was dangerous for me to ride my bike anytime. So I rode to the video/ CD rental shop where I amazed staff by being able to write my name in Japanese characters and copy my address in kanji from another piece of paper. Students from school had felt it necessary to brave the typhoon in order to loiter in the rental shop, although they didn't actually rent anything. They did, however, give me a whistlestop tour of Japanese pop culture via video and cd cases.
I returned to Marui supermarket and the typhoon really started to kick in, with the rain pelting down hard. By the time I reached home I resembled an entrant in an alternative wet t-shirt contest where there really were no winners, only losers, and with my new supply of chocolate, and my rented CDs, I dug in for the night. At least until 7:30 when the power went. And for some reason the water went. And I don't own a torch, so I wandered the corridors of our building where the emergency light was working until the electric came back on.
Tuesday 31st August 2004
Well, the power and water came back late Monday night, so I wasn’t too frazzled on Tuesday, although I was still worrying about lessons. School started with an opening ceremony where we three new teachers had to speak in front of the school. It’s only a small school, under 300 kids, so I wasn’t nervous, and as I began to read my speech (which I’d written in simple Japanese characters), I began to lose all understanding of said characters and babbled into the microphone, before putting my elbows on the lecturn and groaning slowly. Everyone noticed, but they were all too polite to say anything.
At lunchtime I ate a home made salad. Again, they were impressed by my meal making skills (tearing lettuce is very challenging). Another afternoon of not teaching was followed by an evening of not going to the Puffy concert because I was too nervous about elementary school on Wednesday. I had wanted to see Puffy (Japanese female duo) since I found out they were playing in Kuse, but priorities said no…
Wednesday 1st September 2004
First day at elementary school today, and boy was it better than I thought it would be. Prior to school I had to go and introduce myself to the whole of the board of education and I said something stupid like my hobby is seeing the cinema. They noticed, but were too polite to say anything.
School was cool. The kids were funny, and were taken with my bum chin and curly hair. I wasn't taken with their favourite game of 'Tokyo Tower' whereby they try to stick their fingers in inappropriate parts of your person. I'm not Michael Jackson (who incidentally is not mentally ill) and therefore refused to take part in such activities.
A dinner of greek moussaka was given to me at school, despite their being informed that I don't do meat. I was starved and so ate it, and then they kept asking, "was it ok", "did you enjoy it" and "did it taste good?" I replied, "no", "no", and stopped short of saying "it tasted of murder" which would have been hypocritical anyway as I like the taste of murdered fishes. But I did instead tell them it made me feel sick which may be seen in some quarters as being rude, but they were too polite to say anything and pretended not to notice.
The school's headmistress gave me a lift home, during which time I tried to say that the kids were cute, but I ended up saying the fruits were cute. She was too polite and said nothing.
Thursday 2nd September 2004
Back to Junior high, and today saw my first lessons. I gave a self introduction to two classes and the teacher translated. It wasn't great. Everyone was impressed by my salad making skills again, and I got to prepare for another lesson.
One of the ladies in my apartment block gave me a couple of aubergines and a sweet potato on my way home, and when I phoned Johanna to see if I should come over and we could cook, she didn't understand. When I translated it to egg plants and a yam, all was fine. So we cooked and I returned to Katsuyama for a drink with my supervisor (who became quickly drunk) and other Japanese people who speak English better than I. I made the mistake of explaining the words to a Shakira song, and was consequently asked if I preferred big or small breasts. What can you say? I prefer a good fillet? Or a tender loin? I declined to answer and instead laughed ridiculously. And drank some more.
Friday 3rd September 2004
Finallythe weekend... One lesson at school which went well (first years) and I impressed no-one by buying my lunch from Lawson's. Left school at four and rushed home to pack for a weekend of booze and 80's disco.
Johanna and I entertained each other on the bus journey which basically involved two hours of being very loud and noisy on a bus full of silent Japanese. Damn gaijin. And we took lots of photos of anything we could with our phones and emailed them to people. I love my phone. Even though I still can't use it...
We split at Okayama and I went to meet Chad and James in Kurashiki, and begun a night of heavy boozing, good conversation and good bars, ending up at Norio's bar which is the coolest in Kurashiki (well, I've been to at least 5, so I should know, right?)
Saturday 4th September 2004
Tiday was the day of Winkie's birthday and the 80's night, so I made for Okayama city a.s.a.p.
Met with the exclusive group for lunch/ shopping (which basically meant taking each other's photos and fiddling about with our phones for about 2 and a half hours) and then met up with Winkie and Busty (Betsy) and lots of others for a really good Italian meal (I have never been to so many Italian restaurants in such a short time, and this was the best yet). Winkie and Busty were hilarious and photo madness continued- 18 people with new mobile phones, what else do you expect? Then it was to the Aussie bar for an orgy of booze and dancing. As it gets dark at 6pm here, you feel like it's really late when you're going somewhere, but it was 8pm and we were drinking and dancing like it was 2am. Only I kind of forgot to talk to anyone and did dance until it was 1:30am to tunes such as 'Never Ending Story', 'Walk This Way' and 'I Think We're Alone Now'. A special moment though was Carolyn and my junior drama style performance of 'Smooth Operator'. It was special.
Anyway, when we finally stopped dancing and talked to lots of new people who were impressed/ appalled (you decide) we started to make our way to the Canadian bar, but crashed into Lawson's for food. This ended up with Johanna just crashing and her and I going back to Fiona's by 2:30 after she'd had a good chat with a statue and we'd wandered the red light district in fear of rape and STDs.
Sunday 5th September 2004
Was woken up many, many times by alcohol crazed RayVon who really didn't know what was going on at various times of the morning. A misguided attempt at McDonalds led to her going home very soon due to sickness, and our jaded-ness (is that a word?) meant I did not have the strength to shop. I hope you understand the gravity of this.
So I got the early bus home with Johanna and we had our tea at the only cafe with Sunday opening in Katsuyama. It was there or Bonnie's. Or Lawson's...
Early to bed- school tomorrow...
Monday 30th August 2004
Typhoon hits Katsuyama. I receive a phone call at 7:25 am to say that the kids aren't going to school because of the typhoon, but we teachers are because we have our work to do. Damn. Well, I get to school with my prepared speech, and myself and the other two new teachers introduce ourselves to the other staff. I attempt to speak in Japanese and end up telling the staff that I was a nurse in a study in London (?!), but the staff was too polite to say anything. At lunchtime they were amazed because a) I had cooked rice and b) I had done it in a rice cooker and c) I could eat it with chopsticks, which really is amazing.
We left work early for safety reasons, and one of the English teachers advised me that it would be dangerous to ride my bike in the typhoon. I informed her that it was dangerous for me to ride my bike anytime. So I rode to the video/ CD rental shop where I amazed staff by being able to write my name in Japanese characters and copy my address in kanji from another piece of paper. Students from school had felt it necessary to brave the typhoon in order to loiter in the rental shop, although they didn't actually rent anything. They did, however, give me a whistlestop tour of Japanese pop culture via video and cd cases.
I returned to Marui supermarket and the typhoon really started to kick in, with the rain pelting down hard. By the time I reached home I resembled an entrant in an alternative wet t-shirt contest where there really were no winners, only losers, and with my new supply of chocolate, and my rented CDs, I dug in for the night. At least until 7:30 when the power went. And for some reason the water went. And I don't own a torch, so I wandered the corridors of our building where the emergency light was working until the electric came back on.
Tuesday 31st August 2004
Well, the power and water came back late Monday night, so I wasn’t too frazzled on Tuesday, although I was still worrying about lessons. School started with an opening ceremony where we three new teachers had to speak in front of the school. It’s only a small school, under 300 kids, so I wasn’t nervous, and as I began to read my speech (which I’d written in simple Japanese characters), I began to lose all understanding of said characters and babbled into the microphone, before putting my elbows on the lecturn and groaning slowly. Everyone noticed, but they were all too polite to say anything.
At lunchtime I ate a home made salad. Again, they were impressed by my meal making skills (tearing lettuce is very challenging). Another afternoon of not teaching was followed by an evening of not going to the Puffy concert because I was too nervous about elementary school on Wednesday. I had wanted to see Puffy (Japanese female duo) since I found out they were playing in Kuse, but priorities said no…
Wednesday 1st September 2004
First day at elementary school today, and boy was it better than I thought it would be. Prior to school I had to go and introduce myself to the whole of the board of education and I said something stupid like my hobby is seeing the cinema. They noticed, but were too polite to say anything.
School was cool. The kids were funny, and were taken with my bum chin and curly hair. I wasn't taken with their favourite game of 'Tokyo Tower' whereby they try to stick their fingers in inappropriate parts of your person. I'm not Michael Jackson (who incidentally is not mentally ill) and therefore refused to take part in such activities.
A dinner of greek moussaka was given to me at school, despite their being informed that I don't do meat. I was starved and so ate it, and then they kept asking, "was it ok", "did you enjoy it" and "did it taste good?" I replied, "no", "no", and stopped short of saying "it tasted of murder" which would have been hypocritical anyway as I like the taste of murdered fishes. But I did instead tell them it made me feel sick which may be seen in some quarters as being rude, but they were too polite to say anything and pretended not to notice.
The school's headmistress gave me a lift home, during which time I tried to say that the kids were cute, but I ended up saying the fruits were cute. She was too polite and said nothing.
Thursday 2nd September 2004
Back to Junior high, and today saw my first lessons. I gave a self introduction to two classes and the teacher translated. It wasn't great. Everyone was impressed by my salad making skills again, and I got to prepare for another lesson.
One of the ladies in my apartment block gave me a couple of aubergines and a sweet potato on my way home, and when I phoned Johanna to see if I should come over and we could cook, she didn't understand. When I translated it to egg plants and a yam, all was fine. So we cooked and I returned to Katsuyama for a drink with my supervisor (who became quickly drunk) and other Japanese people who speak English better than I. I made the mistake of explaining the words to a Shakira song, and was consequently asked if I preferred big or small breasts. What can you say? I prefer a good fillet? Or a tender loin? I declined to answer and instead laughed ridiculously. And drank some more.
Friday 3rd September 2004
Finallythe weekend... One lesson at school which went well (first years) and I impressed no-one by buying my lunch from Lawson's. Left school at four and rushed home to pack for a weekend of booze and 80's disco.
Johanna and I entertained each other on the bus journey which basically involved two hours of being very loud and noisy on a bus full of silent Japanese. Damn gaijin. And we took lots of photos of anything we could with our phones and emailed them to people. I love my phone. Even though I still can't use it...
We split at Okayama and I went to meet Chad and James in Kurashiki, and begun a night of heavy boozing, good conversation and good bars, ending up at Norio's bar which is the coolest in Kurashiki (well, I've been to at least 5, so I should know, right?)
Saturday 4th September 2004
Tiday was the day of Winkie's birthday and the 80's night, so I made for Okayama city a.s.a.p.
Met with the exclusive group for lunch/ shopping (which basically meant taking each other's photos and fiddling about with our phones for about 2 and a half hours) and then met up with Winkie and Busty (Betsy) and lots of others for a really good Italian meal (I have never been to so many Italian restaurants in such a short time, and this was the best yet). Winkie and Busty were hilarious and photo madness continued- 18 people with new mobile phones, what else do you expect? Then it was to the Aussie bar for an orgy of booze and dancing. As it gets dark at 6pm here, you feel like it's really late when you're going somewhere, but it was 8pm and we were drinking and dancing like it was 2am. Only I kind of forgot to talk to anyone and did dance until it was 1:30am to tunes such as 'Never Ending Story', 'Walk This Way' and 'I Think We're Alone Now'. A special moment though was Carolyn and my junior drama style performance of 'Smooth Operator'. It was special.
Anyway, when we finally stopped dancing and talked to lots of new people who were impressed/ appalled (you decide) we started to make our way to the Canadian bar, but crashed into Lawson's for food. This ended up with Johanna just crashing and her and I going back to Fiona's by 2:30 after she'd had a good chat with a statue and we'd wandered the red light district in fear of rape and STDs.
Sunday 5th September 2004
Was woken up many, many times by alcohol crazed RayVon who really didn't know what was going on at various times of the morning. A misguided attempt at McDonalds led to her going home very soon due to sickness, and our jaded-ness (is that a word?) meant I did not have the strength to shop. I hope you understand the gravity of this.
So I got the early bus home with Johanna and we had our tea at the only cafe with Sunday opening in Katsuyama. It was there or Bonnie's. Or Lawson's...
Early to bed- school tomorrow...
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