The Lebanon will be represented in the semi final of Eurovision 2005. Which part of Europe is the Lebanon in again?
Is it the same part that Israel's in?
Friday, November 26, 2004
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
Thank you, yes thank you, it's fantastic, thank you very much...
If I was Bridget Jones I would open my diary entry like this:
Wednesday, November 24rd
Weight unknown (but greater than before due to excess of rice and pasta in diet), chocolate bars eaten: 5 (v. good, less than yesterday), calories 4,000,000 (pasta for lunch and tea plus chocolate plus lack of exercise), no. of awkward moments with native Japanese 15, no of superficial niceties uttered as part of fitting in 1,000,000,000,000, opportunities for romance: 0 (am the only gay in the village), alcohol intake: 0 (am on plan of enforced abstinence. Enforced for 3 nights a week. Anything more would be unrealistic.)
And this would be a standard entry, except for the two pasta meals and lack of alcohol. The niceties here are part of what makes life great and at the same time frustrating. The Japanese have a hugely complicated greetings system where you use different greetings depending on time of day, location, the importance of person you're speaking to, whether you're visiting or staying, and 1 billion other unfathomable factors. And to make it even more confusing the same words can be used to express the following: nice to meet you, thank you, I'm sorry, hello, goodbye and would you like a single or a double room (probably). To try and say the right thing is akin to trying to bake bread with a only a rolling pin and some flour. It just isn't happening.
But fortunately the Japanese are gracious enough to realise that I am a dunce and are very kind despite my attempts. This is best demonstrated in staff enkais such as the one I had on the 13th November, where teachers you've decided don't like you actually invite you to their house for dinner. It's always a surprise who will try to talk to you. And it's amazing how happy you are to talk about food for the 6 millionth time simply because it means you can talk to someone (although it was a struggle trying to explain that in England we use different types of potato for different dishes. They only have one type of potato here, and they only think you can fry them.) I was very pleased with myself at this enkai because I only drank half a bottle of wine, and left early. Although not before I witnessed the horrific side to Japanese cuisine. The waitress brought out disches covered in polythene and my kocho sensei (headmaster) waved one under my nose. "Ooh, that looks like eel," I thought, until it flipped. It was alive. I jumped (as you would) and kocho sensei unpeeled the cover to reveal live shrimps. That weren't alive for long. With some gusto he ripped the head off the flitting shrimp and then the tail and gobbled it down. I thought of Gollum in Lord of the Rings and his fish. And then I thought about leaving. I was repeatedly offered said shrimps and in an increasingly loud voice, repeatedly said "no". "It's fresh food," said one teacher. "It's too fresh," was my reply. And suddenly sashimi looked horrible too. But I got over that, as you would.
Sunday, November 14th
Chocolate bars eaten: 5, cans of pop drunk (drank?): 4, number of times stared at by old Japanese women 15, number of CDs purchased 3 (but one was Christmassy, so it doesn't count), number of baked goods eaten 5
We went on a group trip to Tsuyama, where we purchased some pitiful Christmas decorations at the 100 yen store. Despite their protestations, I dragged Abby and Johanna to the nicer of the two parks I previously went to (the one without the monument to potatoes). They liked it when we got there, although none of us liked the Australian guy who latched onto us, then said goodbye, and then reappeared 3 times. On one occasion he asked us if we were high on drugs. I don't really think that's much of a way to make friends, although I can kind of understand how he got that impression given that I was shouting at Johanna for wearing white socks (she wasn't doing sports. It's just not acceptable.) And then I stalked a heron around the park for approximately half an hour, attempting to photograph it. Having a camera phone is not a good idea for me.
Monday, 15th November 2004
Hours slept: 3. All other details forgotten due to lack of sleep and the blur of teaching the under 10s.
Busy day at school teaching colours and restaurant conversation to elementary school children. Had to apologise for being 'ill' the previous Friday. No-one appeared to know I was chucking up thanks to Uncle Alcohol. Denied having a cold 15 times. Have no idea what happened in the evening, although I'm quite sure alcohol wasn't involved.
Tuesday, 16th November 2004
Chocolate bars eaten 5, number of unrecognisable food items eaten 5 (elementary school lunch- leftovers from the river), number of healthy food items eaten 0.5 (unrecognisable dinner, eggy, cheesy rice for tea and choc does not equal nutrition), number of boozy drinks drunk 4.
Oh dear. I was found out. My elementary school contact found out I had a hangover on Friday. Fortunately she thought it was hilarious. It was in a way. The way being how wrong can you get it in front of your supervisor. I think I am the first one in the group to pass out in front of their boss. Oops. Again.
In the evening we got the coach to Okayama (me, Christine, LeeJay and Kathleen from a nearby town) for -non excited pause- another conference. Whoopee. We numbed the pain of what was to come by eating and drinking. LeeJay and I had tea in a restaurant at the station and then we met the rest of our gang (RayVon, Fiona, Ab Slance and Saddam) in a yaki tori (fried meat on sticks) restaurant and drank and drank.
Wednesday, 17th November 2004
Conference. No of times previously given information was given again: 54, no of bitchy comments uttered per minute during speeches: 14, no of new friends made through bitching: 7, no. of inappropriate things said in front of Japanese people: 168 (special score).
Yes, in some ways the day was successful. The lectures were the usual old stuff and nonsense, but it's so easy to make new friends when you just bitch. It's like being very honest about other people's failings, and being honest is a virtue, so I try very hard.
I also tried to locate an English Doctor so that I could speak to someone about this itching. I went to the hospital to speak to the English speaking Dermatologist I was told about only to find out that it was a hospital of internal medicine where 'internal' and 'medicine' were the only English words spoken. But! Thanks to the technology that is my mobile phone with it's built in bilingual dictionary, I was able to ask for a dermatologist and they sent me in the direction of a good one. Who also didn't speak English. But at least I got to see this one without three dullard nurses and 2 gossiping receptionists looking on. Gestures and a mobile phone explained my problems and I was given creams and pills that appear to be working. Hallelujah! Praise the Lord!
Fiona and I finished the day by going to an authentic Indian restaurant which had a beautiful English menu, and then we looked at the Christmas trees and decorations in Okayama.
Thursday, 18th November 2004
Somedays you are placed with an individual who proves themself to be an idiot and it brings you closer to those around you. This was one of those days. We were in groups for the conference and had to discuss and comment on various things. Our groups included Japanese English teachers as well as us ALTs. One ALT spent his time making inane comments in an attempt to impress the Japanese teachers and failed miserably, alienating the rest of us too. But we quickly learnt to tune him out and discount his input (which was rubbish really).
I sorted out my tickets home for Christmas! Woo! Woo!
The evening was another quiet one. I was staying at Fiona's and Busty came for tea. We shared a bottle of wine and had a really good chat. How nice! Busty (real name Betsy) is a really cool American girl. She organised a charity drive for the earthquake victims and raised a good deal of money.
Friday, 19th November 2004
Calories 10,000,000 (I blame the French), alcohol 5 units, cds bought 4 (1 was from some nice Peruvians playing pan pipes in the street- cultural- and 3 were second hand so none of them count)
After 1.45 hours of torture (which included a half hour break) at the conference closing, I paid for my flight home (your Christmas present will be my presence. There is no receipt, you can't take it back. Pretend to be pleased...) and Johanna and I headed for Kyoto for our weekend away. The Shinkansen is a wonder and got us there in an hour, and our hotel was lovely. We wandered the streets, looked at a Castle that closed an hour before we arrived then went shopping. And had tea in a restaurant that had an English menu featuring large amounts of "hose" meat. Someone had scribbled underneath the listing, "horse". Either way, it didn't tickle our fancy. But we struggled on and continued to shop, finding courtyards decorated for Christmas, T-shirts with obscenities scrawled on them (oh, how I had to restrain my shopping urges) and had an almost sexual experience when eating products from a French-style patisserie. If people had given us funny looks as we slid down the walls of the shopping centre with chocolate brownie dripping from our mouths I wouldn't know...
Saturday, 20th November 2004
Sights seen 25, number of Japanese people we scandalised: God only knows, number of pictures taken: 145 on mobile phone, 20 on normal camera, chocolate bars eaten 5, staff harrassed in the GAP 3
So after a brief drama of having nowhere to put out baggage we made it to sightseeing. We wandered round a temple complex where they are rebuilding one of the temples from scratch (e.t.a. 2011) and then went to Kiyomizu dera which had lots and lots of red trees and is just a lovely, big temple complex. I went there last year too. Then we went to Heian Jingu, which is another temple complex, built to 2/3 of it's original scale (it's bloody massive). I went there last year too. Then Yasaka pagoda, a big five storey pagoda, on the way to which we saw some maiko (geishas in training) and they seemed to find it funny that I wanted to take their photo. I went there last year too. And finally we went to the Golden Temple which had some of the most stunning autumnal colours in the grounds, and it was almost luminous at dusk. I went there last year too.
We headed back to Kyoto station by bus which drove us delirious and caused us to repeat Japanese niceties under our breath ad nauseum. And the bus was packed with Japanese people who surely weren't impressed. We stopped at the shopping centre where I bought my first hat in years (I have definitely forgotten my principles- it was a GAP purchase) and then harrassed the shop staff because I really liked the Christmas music. Only being Japan, they were unable to give me the info I asked for. So we headed to Osaka and our youth hostel which was loverly...
Sunday, 21st November 2004
Chocolate eaten 5 bars, CDs bought: 3 (but 1 was a Christmas album to aid mental health and the other two were Japanese language, therefore educational and none of them count. Total=0)
Ok, so I've been to Osaka before, and I like it, but we only had a few hours, so it was a bit of a rush. But we managed to fit in shopping and coffee at Starbucks. And I stalked GAP in Osaka where they also couldn't help with Christmas music. We got the highway bus home and marvelled at (a) how cheap it was, (b) how fast it was and (c) how hot it was on board...
Monday, 22nd November 2004
Chocolate bars eaten 0 (call the doctor), alcohol: lots (but not too much), no. of times was asked if I was cold: 12, no. of times I sang hello song with school kids 26 (8 at school, 18 times in the evening)
Back to elementary school for a busy work day where I confounded everyone by wearing only a short sleeved shirt for the latter part of the day. And then we stayed at a Japanese friend's. Every Japanese house contains something that boggles your mind. The lift in the dentist's house in Hiroshima seemed rather bizarre, but this lady had not only a bidet/wash/ heated toilet seat combo western style loo, she had a urinal as well. The word "why?" kept ringing in my head...
But she is lovely and we have chatted a lot since I got here, and she invited LeeJay and me to her home as there was traditional entertainment on in Tsukida (the town outside mine) that night. The entertainment was an extended version of what we saw on a trip to Bisei town in August on our orientation, but this was funny. Loads of the kids from my schools were there and all came up to say hello, and the locals were all very friendly, even if they couldn't speak English. Lots of hot sake was drunk, and a good time was only marred by the apparent cold. I say apparent, because I was a bit chilly but everyone else was acting like they were sitting in a freezer.
Tuesday, 23rd November 2004
National holiday. Labour thankgiving day. I don't understand the concept.
But we did nothing relevant. Ab Slance came from Shingo town and we went to the launderette. And had English conversation class in the evening.
Wednesday, 24th November 2004
See top.
Today we watched Christine teach and had to comment and say lots of polite things to Japanese people and then a group of us had lunch together and then I got my hair straightened again. This last detail is clearly the most ineresting and important thing that has happened in the last week, and therefore I feel happy closing on this point.
Ta ra for now. No-one here would understand that if I said it to the.
Wednesday, November 24rd
Weight unknown (but greater than before due to excess of rice and pasta in diet), chocolate bars eaten: 5 (v. good, less than yesterday), calories 4,000,000 (pasta for lunch and tea plus chocolate plus lack of exercise), no. of awkward moments with native Japanese 15, no of superficial niceties uttered as part of fitting in 1,000,000,000,000, opportunities for romance: 0 (am the only gay in the village), alcohol intake: 0 (am on plan of enforced abstinence. Enforced for 3 nights a week. Anything more would be unrealistic.)
And this would be a standard entry, except for the two pasta meals and lack of alcohol. The niceties here are part of what makes life great and at the same time frustrating. The Japanese have a hugely complicated greetings system where you use different greetings depending on time of day, location, the importance of person you're speaking to, whether you're visiting or staying, and 1 billion other unfathomable factors. And to make it even more confusing the same words can be used to express the following: nice to meet you, thank you, I'm sorry, hello, goodbye and would you like a single or a double room (probably). To try and say the right thing is akin to trying to bake bread with a only a rolling pin and some flour. It just isn't happening.
But fortunately the Japanese are gracious enough to realise that I am a dunce and are very kind despite my attempts. This is best demonstrated in staff enkais such as the one I had on the 13th November, where teachers you've decided don't like you actually invite you to their house for dinner. It's always a surprise who will try to talk to you. And it's amazing how happy you are to talk about food for the 6 millionth time simply because it means you can talk to someone (although it was a struggle trying to explain that in England we use different types of potato for different dishes. They only have one type of potato here, and they only think you can fry them.) I was very pleased with myself at this enkai because I only drank half a bottle of wine, and left early. Although not before I witnessed the horrific side to Japanese cuisine. The waitress brought out disches covered in polythene and my kocho sensei (headmaster) waved one under my nose. "Ooh, that looks like eel," I thought, until it flipped. It was alive. I jumped (as you would) and kocho sensei unpeeled the cover to reveal live shrimps. That weren't alive for long. With some gusto he ripped the head off the flitting shrimp and then the tail and gobbled it down. I thought of Gollum in Lord of the Rings and his fish. And then I thought about leaving. I was repeatedly offered said shrimps and in an increasingly loud voice, repeatedly said "no". "It's fresh food," said one teacher. "It's too fresh," was my reply. And suddenly sashimi looked horrible too. But I got over that, as you would.
Sunday, November 14th
Chocolate bars eaten: 5, cans of pop drunk (drank?): 4, number of times stared at by old Japanese women 15, number of CDs purchased 3 (but one was Christmassy, so it doesn't count), number of baked goods eaten 5
We went on a group trip to Tsuyama, where we purchased some pitiful Christmas decorations at the 100 yen store. Despite their protestations, I dragged Abby and Johanna to the nicer of the two parks I previously went to (the one without the monument to potatoes). They liked it when we got there, although none of us liked the Australian guy who latched onto us, then said goodbye, and then reappeared 3 times. On one occasion he asked us if we were high on drugs. I don't really think that's much of a way to make friends, although I can kind of understand how he got that impression given that I was shouting at Johanna for wearing white socks (she wasn't doing sports. It's just not acceptable.) And then I stalked a heron around the park for approximately half an hour, attempting to photograph it. Having a camera phone is not a good idea for me.
Monday, 15th November 2004
Hours slept: 3. All other details forgotten due to lack of sleep and the blur of teaching the under 10s.
Busy day at school teaching colours and restaurant conversation to elementary school children. Had to apologise for being 'ill' the previous Friday. No-one appeared to know I was chucking up thanks to Uncle Alcohol. Denied having a cold 15 times. Have no idea what happened in the evening, although I'm quite sure alcohol wasn't involved.
Tuesday, 16th November 2004
Chocolate bars eaten 5, number of unrecognisable food items eaten 5 (elementary school lunch- leftovers from the river), number of healthy food items eaten 0.5 (unrecognisable dinner, eggy, cheesy rice for tea and choc does not equal nutrition), number of boozy drinks drunk 4.
Oh dear. I was found out. My elementary school contact found out I had a hangover on Friday. Fortunately she thought it was hilarious. It was in a way. The way being how wrong can you get it in front of your supervisor. I think I am the first one in the group to pass out in front of their boss. Oops. Again.
In the evening we got the coach to Okayama (me, Christine, LeeJay and Kathleen from a nearby town) for -non excited pause- another conference. Whoopee. We numbed the pain of what was to come by eating and drinking. LeeJay and I had tea in a restaurant at the station and then we met the rest of our gang (RayVon, Fiona, Ab Slance and Saddam) in a yaki tori (fried meat on sticks) restaurant and drank and drank.
Wednesday, 17th November 2004
Conference. No of times previously given information was given again: 54, no of bitchy comments uttered per minute during speeches: 14, no of new friends made through bitching: 7, no. of inappropriate things said in front of Japanese people: 168 (special score).
Yes, in some ways the day was successful. The lectures were the usual old stuff and nonsense, but it's so easy to make new friends when you just bitch. It's like being very honest about other people's failings, and being honest is a virtue, so I try very hard.
I also tried to locate an English Doctor so that I could speak to someone about this itching. I went to the hospital to speak to the English speaking Dermatologist I was told about only to find out that it was a hospital of internal medicine where 'internal' and 'medicine' were the only English words spoken. But! Thanks to the technology that is my mobile phone with it's built in bilingual dictionary, I was able to ask for a dermatologist and they sent me in the direction of a good one. Who also didn't speak English. But at least I got to see this one without three dullard nurses and 2 gossiping receptionists looking on. Gestures and a mobile phone explained my problems and I was given creams and pills that appear to be working. Hallelujah! Praise the Lord!
Fiona and I finished the day by going to an authentic Indian restaurant which had a beautiful English menu, and then we looked at the Christmas trees and decorations in Okayama.
Thursday, 18th November 2004
Somedays you are placed with an individual who proves themself to be an idiot and it brings you closer to those around you. This was one of those days. We were in groups for the conference and had to discuss and comment on various things. Our groups included Japanese English teachers as well as us ALTs. One ALT spent his time making inane comments in an attempt to impress the Japanese teachers and failed miserably, alienating the rest of us too. But we quickly learnt to tune him out and discount his input (which was rubbish really).
I sorted out my tickets home for Christmas! Woo! Woo!
The evening was another quiet one. I was staying at Fiona's and Busty came for tea. We shared a bottle of wine and had a really good chat. How nice! Busty (real name Betsy) is a really cool American girl. She organised a charity drive for the earthquake victims and raised a good deal of money.
Friday, 19th November 2004
Calories 10,000,000 (I blame the French), alcohol 5 units, cds bought 4 (1 was from some nice Peruvians playing pan pipes in the street- cultural- and 3 were second hand so none of them count)
After 1.45 hours of torture (which included a half hour break) at the conference closing, I paid for my flight home (your Christmas present will be my presence. There is no receipt, you can't take it back. Pretend to be pleased...) and Johanna and I headed for Kyoto for our weekend away. The Shinkansen is a wonder and got us there in an hour, and our hotel was lovely. We wandered the streets, looked at a Castle that closed an hour before we arrived then went shopping. And had tea in a restaurant that had an English menu featuring large amounts of "hose" meat. Someone had scribbled underneath the listing, "horse". Either way, it didn't tickle our fancy. But we struggled on and continued to shop, finding courtyards decorated for Christmas, T-shirts with obscenities scrawled on them (oh, how I had to restrain my shopping urges) and had an almost sexual experience when eating products from a French-style patisserie. If people had given us funny looks as we slid down the walls of the shopping centre with chocolate brownie dripping from our mouths I wouldn't know...
Saturday, 20th November 2004
Sights seen 25, number of Japanese people we scandalised: God only knows, number of pictures taken: 145 on mobile phone, 20 on normal camera, chocolate bars eaten 5, staff harrassed in the GAP 3
So after a brief drama of having nowhere to put out baggage we made it to sightseeing. We wandered round a temple complex where they are rebuilding one of the temples from scratch (e.t.a. 2011) and then went to Kiyomizu dera which had lots and lots of red trees and is just a lovely, big temple complex. I went there last year too. Then we went to Heian Jingu, which is another temple complex, built to 2/3 of it's original scale (it's bloody massive). I went there last year too. Then Yasaka pagoda, a big five storey pagoda, on the way to which we saw some maiko (geishas in training) and they seemed to find it funny that I wanted to take their photo. I went there last year too. And finally we went to the Golden Temple which had some of the most stunning autumnal colours in the grounds, and it was almost luminous at dusk. I went there last year too.
We headed back to Kyoto station by bus which drove us delirious and caused us to repeat Japanese niceties under our breath ad nauseum. And the bus was packed with Japanese people who surely weren't impressed. We stopped at the shopping centre where I bought my first hat in years (I have definitely forgotten my principles- it was a GAP purchase) and then harrassed the shop staff because I really liked the Christmas music. Only being Japan, they were unable to give me the info I asked for. So we headed to Osaka and our youth hostel which was loverly...
Sunday, 21st November 2004
Chocolate eaten 5 bars, CDs bought: 3 (but 1 was a Christmas album to aid mental health and the other two were Japanese language, therefore educational and none of them count. Total=0)
Ok, so I've been to Osaka before, and I like it, but we only had a few hours, so it was a bit of a rush. But we managed to fit in shopping and coffee at Starbucks. And I stalked GAP in Osaka where they also couldn't help with Christmas music. We got the highway bus home and marvelled at (a) how cheap it was, (b) how fast it was and (c) how hot it was on board...
Monday, 22nd November 2004
Chocolate bars eaten 0 (call the doctor), alcohol: lots (but not too much), no. of times was asked if I was cold: 12, no. of times I sang hello song with school kids 26 (8 at school, 18 times in the evening)
Back to elementary school for a busy work day where I confounded everyone by wearing only a short sleeved shirt for the latter part of the day. And then we stayed at a Japanese friend's. Every Japanese house contains something that boggles your mind. The lift in the dentist's house in Hiroshima seemed rather bizarre, but this lady had not only a bidet/wash/ heated toilet seat combo western style loo, she had a urinal as well. The word "why?" kept ringing in my head...
But she is lovely and we have chatted a lot since I got here, and she invited LeeJay and me to her home as there was traditional entertainment on in Tsukida (the town outside mine) that night. The entertainment was an extended version of what we saw on a trip to Bisei town in August on our orientation, but this was funny. Loads of the kids from my schools were there and all came up to say hello, and the locals were all very friendly, even if they couldn't speak English. Lots of hot sake was drunk, and a good time was only marred by the apparent cold. I say apparent, because I was a bit chilly but everyone else was acting like they were sitting in a freezer.
Tuesday, 23rd November 2004
National holiday. Labour thankgiving day. I don't understand the concept.
But we did nothing relevant. Ab Slance came from Shingo town and we went to the launderette. And had English conversation class in the evening.
Wednesday, 24th November 2004
See top.
Today we watched Christine teach and had to comment and say lots of polite things to Japanese people and then a group of us had lunch together and then I got my hair straightened again. This last detail is clearly the most ineresting and important thing that has happened in the last week, and therefore I feel happy closing on this point.
Ta ra for now. No-one here would understand that if I said it to the.
Friday, November 12, 2004
Is Betty Ford in the house? Please?...
OK, I always liked Sue Ellen off Dallas, but really I don't think this is the time or the place to be emulating her behaviour (and I'm not talking about wearing shoulder pads and too much make-up either). If someone would care to book me a spell in the sanitorium I really wouldn't object too much. As long as I didn't have to share a room with another alkie and the telly was in English. What fun's a hangover when you can't even watch Richard and Judy? Anyway, more about this later. It's been an emotional 10 days what with speech contest, festival, lack of sleep and being asked if the reason teachers didn't invite me to lessons was because the kids didn't like me. How bloody rude. Fortunately my supervisor put them straight...
So speech contest finally happened. Wednesday, November 3rd. It was a day we'd been dreading - the video of last year's event either a) sends you to sleep or b) incites violence. But fortunately we'd all made sure our students had interesting/ funny texts to recite. And it was hilarious. Thirteen girls from my junior high entered, and I had been heavily involved from the point of finding their texts to coaching their pronunciation. They worked really, really hard to get the gestures right and to memorize their speeches, which may be part of the reason why I turned into stage school mother from hell. Myself and 5 other assistant English teachers (and the fascist guy) were judging and about 15 minutes into the thing I was gushing about how well my girls were doing and telling the other judges to give them excellent marks. Well, I didn't need to 'cause they were really good. One pair came second and another third in the recitation section and another of them won the speech section. I was very pleased and very disappointed that I couldn't congratulate them in Japanese. The closest I could manage was happy new year. Oh well...
After the contest, us judges went to karaoke with the guy from the rotary club and the fascist- the two we had previously been to dinner with. This part was looking to be really awful as it was election day in the US and we really didn't want to be talking to the fascist about this fact. But instead we just drank a lot (despite the fact that it was only 3pm) and sang the most ridiculous songs we could. Or was that just me? I found 'Jenny From The Block' in the karaoke book and did an alarming on key rendition of it. The others were scared...
Thursday night saw the last rehearsal for our dance practise. Let me fill you in on the info I had to date for the dance:
1) it was to start at 7pm and we would dance in 5 places around town
2) we were doing the dance as part of the Katsuyama festival which finished a few weeks ago
That was all. All other questions weren't answered, and as usual I had to make do with the info people deemed suitable to give me. Eugene was coming for a visit from Tokyo and the 7pm start fitted in nicely. Except it wasn't a 7pm start. As the rehearsal started, one of the guys was walking round with a schedule. The day started at 8. 8AM!!! Argh! There was nothing I could do, so I warned Eugene and we carried on as usual. It was also a different festival- it was the Katsuyama Momiji Festival (which is what they call the red leaves on Japanese Maple trees in autumn). So I quickly told Christine there was a festival on Sunday...
On Friday I got a phone call at school. Can I go to another rehearsal, a special one. Ok, I'll be there. 6pm at the Ponti Hall (the name they occasionally use for the town hall). So I went. And was one of only 6 people who attended from our team. I began to fume as I was ready to drop from tiredness, but I couldn't say anything because the people there were really nice. And they had copies of the programme to give me. It had a schedule of things happening on the stage and a list of the performers. "Oh," I thought, "I recognise some of those names. That's the hospital and that's one of my schools. What are they doing?" I asked. "They're dancing," came the reply. "What dance are they doing?" "A different version of what we're doing". "What about the rest?" "Them too, it's a... a... contest." Excuse me? Not only do I start at 8am but we're competing against teams from around the district? Is there anything else you've neglected to tell me?
Saturday was a busy day. We went to Niimi city with Abby and looked at Momiji. We went to a spot called 'Ikura' (Japanese for 'how much?') and it was real purdy. A cliff face with loads of trees and a river in front. And a cave system that you could walk through. And we did. It went on for ages and ages, the floors were slippy, the path was narrow and the roof was low in many places, and you consistently had to watch your head. But being Japan, they'd managed to install a speaker system throughout where some Japanese woman blathered on in a high pitched voice that made your experience just that little bit less pleasant.
In the evening Eugene arrived, and me, he, Johanna and Abby spent the best part of an hour trying to find space in a restaurant in Katsuyama. They were all full. Every last one turned us away. I began to feel like the Virgin Mary at Christmas and started looking for barns containing dining tables, when Johanna remembered the place up the hill where they hate us. We say hate us, but we went there once, and when we went in the woman seemed happy. After 10 mins of struggling to order (we were speaking Japanese) her face dropped and it all seemed too much trouble. But hooray! Eugene speaks Japanese. So we went there and it was successful. Lots of food and drink later, we ended up in Karaoke where we had a boys v. girls contest. We won, or perhaps we beat them into submission by singing horrors such as 'I will always love you' and 'All by myself'. And we drank more. And more. And didn't get to bed till 2am. Oops.
So it's 7am on Sunday, I am due to spend a day looking like a gay fisherman and dancing round town and I have a hangover. A hangover that forces me to forgo breakfast. Not a good sign. But it's soon alright, because at 8:30 after we're all changed into costume, they bring out the sake. And everyone is drinking. My stomach feels a bit better, so yeah, I'll drink too. Lord. I've never done hair of the dog before. It worked but had the side effect of making me drunk again before 10am. My supervisor asked me if I was nervous about dancing in front of everyone. I replied no. He seemed surprised, so I told him, "well, it's not like I know these people, is it?" The day was great. I have never seen so many people in the town, it was buzzing. Everywhere I went I had schoolkids coming up and saying hello (proving that I am popular...)
The only glitch was on our final performance on the main stage. There was a compere for the event and she was talking to people from each team, I assumed probably the choreographer and the captain. I assumed wrong. We finish dancing and she starts walking across the stage, I'm thinking "she's not going to talk to me. She's not going to talk to me. She's not... Shit. She is." And a microphone is thrust in my face. Well, bugger me if she didn't speak faster than a 6year old on Christmas morning. In Japanese. I answered her first question. I answered her second question. And then she just started babbling. And she held the microphone to my mouth. I looked at the crowd (my whole town) and looked at her, and said in Japanese, "I'm sorry, I don't understand". She tried again and I just looked at her. She asked my team mates (3 of whom spoke English) for assistance. They didn't move. She asked one final thing which I answered and then, thank God, we left the stage.
We didn't win. We didn't even get placed, but it was a really fun day.
Eugene left on Tuesday morning- we'd spent Sunday and Monday evenings watching DVDs. On Wednesday I met Johanna and we dinner in Kuse, and then on Thursday (yesterday) I went to a party at a restaurant for our dance team. I was (once again) very tired and had classes at elementary school today, so I didn't plan on staying long. I remember thinking "this'll be my last drink" at about 7 o'clock. Oops. After 2 gin and tonics and 2 pints of Chu-hai (Japanese alco-pops) I moved down the table and started necking sake with some people. 3 of us drank over a litre of sake. Lord, it does taste good, but the effects are bad. Everyone started asking me how old they were, and most I couldn't tell, so I erred on the side of caution and made people happy. Except for when I told someone they looked 30 and they were actually 24. Oh well. He thought it was funny though, so I was alright. I don't really remember much after that. I passed out in the restaurant and when I woke up I decided to be all international and extend the hand of friendship to a Japanese squat toilet. Or should I say to extend the contents of my stomach. I was not a well boy. My supervisor and the 30-year-old-looking-24-year-old took me home in a cab (thank the lord, because when we got there I couldn't even get the key in the door) and once inside I decided I should extend the hand of friendship to my own loo. I have no idea what time any of this happened and also no idea of how I got to bed. I do know I woke up at six in a very not right way, and at 7:25 I had to phone my supervisor to say I couldn't go to school. I'm so very grateful that a Japanese friend in England (Kasumi) taught me the word for vomiting. It has come in very handy...
So today's been written off as my liver did it's best to recover and I caught up on missing sleep from the last three months. Tomorrow I have school culture festival and then we have a staff party afterwards. I feel my attendance may be on the brief side. Unless Sue Ellen takes possession of my soul once more. Why couldn't I have liked a more decent, stable character like Ray Crebbs or Bobby Ewing?
So speech contest finally happened. Wednesday, November 3rd. It was a day we'd been dreading - the video of last year's event either a) sends you to sleep or b) incites violence. But fortunately we'd all made sure our students had interesting/ funny texts to recite. And it was hilarious. Thirteen girls from my junior high entered, and I had been heavily involved from the point of finding their texts to coaching their pronunciation. They worked really, really hard to get the gestures right and to memorize their speeches, which may be part of the reason why I turned into stage school mother from hell. Myself and 5 other assistant English teachers (and the fascist guy) were judging and about 15 minutes into the thing I was gushing about how well my girls were doing and telling the other judges to give them excellent marks. Well, I didn't need to 'cause they were really good. One pair came second and another third in the recitation section and another of them won the speech section. I was very pleased and very disappointed that I couldn't congratulate them in Japanese. The closest I could manage was happy new year. Oh well...
After the contest, us judges went to karaoke with the guy from the rotary club and the fascist- the two we had previously been to dinner with. This part was looking to be really awful as it was election day in the US and we really didn't want to be talking to the fascist about this fact. But instead we just drank a lot (despite the fact that it was only 3pm) and sang the most ridiculous songs we could. Or was that just me? I found 'Jenny From The Block' in the karaoke book and did an alarming on key rendition of it. The others were scared...
Thursday night saw the last rehearsal for our dance practise. Let me fill you in on the info I had to date for the dance:
1) it was to start at 7pm and we would dance in 5 places around town
2) we were doing the dance as part of the Katsuyama festival which finished a few weeks ago
That was all. All other questions weren't answered, and as usual I had to make do with the info people deemed suitable to give me. Eugene was coming for a visit from Tokyo and the 7pm start fitted in nicely. Except it wasn't a 7pm start. As the rehearsal started, one of the guys was walking round with a schedule. The day started at 8. 8AM!!! Argh! There was nothing I could do, so I warned Eugene and we carried on as usual. It was also a different festival- it was the Katsuyama Momiji Festival (which is what they call the red leaves on Japanese Maple trees in autumn). So I quickly told Christine there was a festival on Sunday...
On Friday I got a phone call at school. Can I go to another rehearsal, a special one. Ok, I'll be there. 6pm at the Ponti Hall (the name they occasionally use for the town hall). So I went. And was one of only 6 people who attended from our team. I began to fume as I was ready to drop from tiredness, but I couldn't say anything because the people there were really nice. And they had copies of the programme to give me. It had a schedule of things happening on the stage and a list of the performers. "Oh," I thought, "I recognise some of those names. That's the hospital and that's one of my schools. What are they doing?" I asked. "They're dancing," came the reply. "What dance are they doing?" "A different version of what we're doing". "What about the rest?" "Them too, it's a... a... contest." Excuse me? Not only do I start at 8am but we're competing against teams from around the district? Is there anything else you've neglected to tell me?
Saturday was a busy day. We went to Niimi city with Abby and looked at Momiji. We went to a spot called 'Ikura' (Japanese for 'how much?') and it was real purdy. A cliff face with loads of trees and a river in front. And a cave system that you could walk through. And we did. It went on for ages and ages, the floors were slippy, the path was narrow and the roof was low in many places, and you consistently had to watch your head. But being Japan, they'd managed to install a speaker system throughout where some Japanese woman blathered on in a high pitched voice that made your experience just that little bit less pleasant.
In the evening Eugene arrived, and me, he, Johanna and Abby spent the best part of an hour trying to find space in a restaurant in Katsuyama. They were all full. Every last one turned us away. I began to feel like the Virgin Mary at Christmas and started looking for barns containing dining tables, when Johanna remembered the place up the hill where they hate us. We say hate us, but we went there once, and when we went in the woman seemed happy. After 10 mins of struggling to order (we were speaking Japanese) her face dropped and it all seemed too much trouble. But hooray! Eugene speaks Japanese. So we went there and it was successful. Lots of food and drink later, we ended up in Karaoke where we had a boys v. girls contest. We won, or perhaps we beat them into submission by singing horrors such as 'I will always love you' and 'All by myself'. And we drank more. And more. And didn't get to bed till 2am. Oops.
So it's 7am on Sunday, I am due to spend a day looking like a gay fisherman and dancing round town and I have a hangover. A hangover that forces me to forgo breakfast. Not a good sign. But it's soon alright, because at 8:30 after we're all changed into costume, they bring out the sake. And everyone is drinking. My stomach feels a bit better, so yeah, I'll drink too. Lord. I've never done hair of the dog before. It worked but had the side effect of making me drunk again before 10am. My supervisor asked me if I was nervous about dancing in front of everyone. I replied no. He seemed surprised, so I told him, "well, it's not like I know these people, is it?" The day was great. I have never seen so many people in the town, it was buzzing. Everywhere I went I had schoolkids coming up and saying hello (proving that I am popular...)
The only glitch was on our final performance on the main stage. There was a compere for the event and she was talking to people from each team, I assumed probably the choreographer and the captain. I assumed wrong. We finish dancing and she starts walking across the stage, I'm thinking "she's not going to talk to me. She's not going to talk to me. She's not... Shit. She is." And a microphone is thrust in my face. Well, bugger me if she didn't speak faster than a 6year old on Christmas morning. In Japanese. I answered her first question. I answered her second question. And then she just started babbling. And she held the microphone to my mouth. I looked at the crowd (my whole town) and looked at her, and said in Japanese, "I'm sorry, I don't understand". She tried again and I just looked at her. She asked my team mates (3 of whom spoke English) for assistance. They didn't move. She asked one final thing which I answered and then, thank God, we left the stage.
We didn't win. We didn't even get placed, but it was a really fun day.
Eugene left on Tuesday morning- we'd spent Sunday and Monday evenings watching DVDs. On Wednesday I met Johanna and we dinner in Kuse, and then on Thursday (yesterday) I went to a party at a restaurant for our dance team. I was (once again) very tired and had classes at elementary school today, so I didn't plan on staying long. I remember thinking "this'll be my last drink" at about 7 o'clock. Oops. After 2 gin and tonics and 2 pints of Chu-hai (Japanese alco-pops) I moved down the table and started necking sake with some people. 3 of us drank over a litre of sake. Lord, it does taste good, but the effects are bad. Everyone started asking me how old they were, and most I couldn't tell, so I erred on the side of caution and made people happy. Except for when I told someone they looked 30 and they were actually 24. Oh well. He thought it was funny though, so I was alright. I don't really remember much after that. I passed out in the restaurant and when I woke up I decided to be all international and extend the hand of friendship to a Japanese squat toilet. Or should I say to extend the contents of my stomach. I was not a well boy. My supervisor and the 30-year-old-looking-24-year-old took me home in a cab (thank the lord, because when we got there I couldn't even get the key in the door) and once inside I decided I should extend the hand of friendship to my own loo. I have no idea what time any of this happened and also no idea of how I got to bed. I do know I woke up at six in a very not right way, and at 7:25 I had to phone my supervisor to say I couldn't go to school. I'm so very grateful that a Japanese friend in England (Kasumi) taught me the word for vomiting. It has come in very handy...
So today's been written off as my liver did it's best to recover and I caught up on missing sleep from the last three months. Tomorrow I have school culture festival and then we have a staff party afterwards. I feel my attendance may be on the brief side. Unless Sue Ellen takes possession of my soul once more. Why couldn't I have liked a more decent, stable character like Ray Crebbs or Bobby Ewing?
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
Sorry? What’s going on?
As usual the week has been different and full of surprises. Surprising weather, surprising amounts of work and surprising last minute invites. It was the end of my first three months in Japan and in many ways I’m still as confused as when I arrived here.
The weekend of 23rd October was my first weekend alone in Katsuyama. Most people were doing something for the weekend and due to dance practice on the Friday I wasn’t able to get to the city that night. So I opted for entertaining myself. Bad choice.
On Saturday I woke up unreasonably early (8:30, which in my book is obscene for a day off) and caught a train to Tsuyama, the nearest city to mine- although trade descriptions could be brought in here to investigate. If Tsuyama’s a city then Ilford is a country. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it was nice and not sooo small,but the shopping area was more like an old fashioned town, with local shops and local cafes. Where were the chain stores? Now, yes it is a great thing that many small enterprises have survived blah, blah, blah, but when you know the only place you can get a decent cup of coffee is Starbucks, you are sure to be disappointed. Anyway, despite the lack of quality shopping I forged ahead and did my best to help boost Japan’s economy (I like to help where I can). I also found a nice café/ restaurant which was replete with old fashioned gas lamps and union jack cushions. I say I found it, but a café’s hardly lost when it’s sat on the main street and called ‘Madonna’, is it?
I also did the culture thing by visiting two parks, both of which showed evidence of typhoon destruction. The first park was actually the site of Tsuyama castle, although the castle isn't there. I couldn’t figure out where it was, but I have the feeling tinkers may be selling bits of it door to door in the nearest town. The grounds still have the stone walls that acted as foundations (though they’ll be stripped and sold within the week I’m sure) and are lined with trees and random displays (including a tent-like fabric shrine covered in potatoes. Rice I might have understood, but potatoes?) There is also a mini zoo that holds peacocks and birds with funny beaks and a couple of raccoons who are desperate for freedom. I too would be desperate for freedom if my house was falling down around me and I’d been locked in. Grim is an understatement.
The next park was called Shirakoen and was more a traditional Japanese landscaped garden. Again, it showed much typhoon damage with large areas being off limits to the public. This park was really beautiful and featured many Japanese maples, a big lake, some traditional Japanese huts and lots of ornamental (ie pretty, but fairly unstable) bridges. I scared away most of the other sight-seers by looking slightly maniacal with my camera and my mobile phone camera. And the fact that I was wearing a t-shirt and shorts seemed to be a shocker too. It was a mild day, and I was very comfortable. As, obviously, were the people pointing from the bus windows who looked like they thought shorts in late October were hilarious. A word of warning to those people- don’t ever go to Australia. November will kill you.
Anyway, when I got back home I turned on the telly to see lots of pictures of a train station and aerial views of a shinkansen bullet train. And it was on every channel. I first thought, “Has Princess Diana died again, this time on a train?” and then I received a phone call from my Mum telling me about the earthquake. The earthquake in Niigata is still causing problems. After an initial tremor of 6.8 there have been over 200 aftershocks, including one measuring 6 on the richter scale. Many people have been killed, thousands are still without power or water and thousands are still not in their homes. The TV pictures didn’t bring home the gravity of what had happened though- much time was spent showing branches of Lawson’s where bottles of coke had fallen out of fridges and bookshops where books had fallen off the shelves. Occasionally you’d catch pictures of highways that were ripped into 3 or more pieces as if this was an afterthought.
Sunday was a quiet day of preparation for school. At least that’s what I like to think. I basically stayed in bed for hours and hours and then at 3:30 left my flat to go for lunch somewhere. I eventually figured out what to do in my lessons at about, oh, 10:30pm…
And thus started the craziest week yet. The social life got put away and the previous month’s frivolity were forgotten. Everyday at elementary school I taught 4 or five lessons until 4pm. On Monday, Tuesday and Thursday I went to Junior high at 4pm to help the students rehearse for speech contest. On Wednesday I was stuck in school in the mountains with no means of escape (I should have paid more attention to McGyver). At 6 o’clock on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday I had dance practice from 6 to 7 pm and on Tuesday from 7:30 till 9 I had English Conversation class. The only break I had was on Tuesday night when I watched a Japanese cartoon film (English title: “Castles in the Sky”) which was excellent. Except that the Castle in the sky was called Laputa which is Spanish for “whore”.
Well, on Friday I was lucky enough to cadge an early lift home and got the bus to Okayama for a wild night with Johanna and Fiona. Except by the time we got there we were a) very annoyed for being told off on the bus for being too noisy (we were told at the end of the journey by which time there was nothing we could do) and b) we were stupidly tired. So we went to a nice, new bar and had a few drinks and went home to watch a DVD.
On Saturday I met Chad and we went to see Mr Miyoshi, the crazy dentist in Chad’s old Hiroshima town. It was a great night. Mrs Miyoshi is an excellent cook and Mr Miyoshi loves booze, and loves even more giving booze to people. We started drinking at 5pm. By seven thirty, having drunk 5 types of alcohol, I was in a very bad way. By 9:30 I was laughing at nothing and struggling to stay upright. By 10:30 we were in bed. Fortunately (and surprisingly) I was hangover free on Sunday and managed to continue to assist in aiding Japan’s financial recovery by actioning a massive surge in spending in Okayama city. I wasn’t doing it for me, I was doing it for the people of Japan.
Well, yesterday was my first day back in Junior high. Back to lesson free days- almost. Speech contest is on Wednesday, so all free time is taken up practicing for that, and then practicing for the dance on Sunday. And then the social whirl had better restart or this is going to get rather dry...
The weekend of 23rd October was my first weekend alone in Katsuyama. Most people were doing something for the weekend and due to dance practice on the Friday I wasn’t able to get to the city that night. So I opted for entertaining myself. Bad choice.
On Saturday I woke up unreasonably early (8:30, which in my book is obscene for a day off) and caught a train to Tsuyama, the nearest city to mine- although trade descriptions could be brought in here to investigate. If Tsuyama’s a city then Ilford is a country. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it was nice and not sooo small,but the shopping area was more like an old fashioned town, with local shops and local cafes. Where were the chain stores? Now, yes it is a great thing that many small enterprises have survived blah, blah, blah, but when you know the only place you can get a decent cup of coffee is Starbucks, you are sure to be disappointed. Anyway, despite the lack of quality shopping I forged ahead and did my best to help boost Japan’s economy (I like to help where I can). I also found a nice café/ restaurant which was replete with old fashioned gas lamps and union jack cushions. I say I found it, but a café’s hardly lost when it’s sat on the main street and called ‘Madonna’, is it?
I also did the culture thing by visiting two parks, both of which showed evidence of typhoon destruction. The first park was actually the site of Tsuyama castle, although the castle isn't there. I couldn’t figure out where it was, but I have the feeling tinkers may be selling bits of it door to door in the nearest town. The grounds still have the stone walls that acted as foundations (though they’ll be stripped and sold within the week I’m sure) and are lined with trees and random displays (including a tent-like fabric shrine covered in potatoes. Rice I might have understood, but potatoes?) There is also a mini zoo that holds peacocks and birds with funny beaks and a couple of raccoons who are desperate for freedom. I too would be desperate for freedom if my house was falling down around me and I’d been locked in. Grim is an understatement.
The next park was called Shirakoen and was more a traditional Japanese landscaped garden. Again, it showed much typhoon damage with large areas being off limits to the public. This park was really beautiful and featured many Japanese maples, a big lake, some traditional Japanese huts and lots of ornamental (ie pretty, but fairly unstable) bridges. I scared away most of the other sight-seers by looking slightly maniacal with my camera and my mobile phone camera. And the fact that I was wearing a t-shirt and shorts seemed to be a shocker too. It was a mild day, and I was very comfortable. As, obviously, were the people pointing from the bus windows who looked like they thought shorts in late October were hilarious. A word of warning to those people- don’t ever go to Australia. November will kill you.
Anyway, when I got back home I turned on the telly to see lots of pictures of a train station and aerial views of a shinkansen bullet train. And it was on every channel. I first thought, “Has Princess Diana died again, this time on a train?” and then I received a phone call from my Mum telling me about the earthquake. The earthquake in Niigata is still causing problems. After an initial tremor of 6.8 there have been over 200 aftershocks, including one measuring 6 on the richter scale. Many people have been killed, thousands are still without power or water and thousands are still not in their homes. The TV pictures didn’t bring home the gravity of what had happened though- much time was spent showing branches of Lawson’s where bottles of coke had fallen out of fridges and bookshops where books had fallen off the shelves. Occasionally you’d catch pictures of highways that were ripped into 3 or more pieces as if this was an afterthought.
Sunday was a quiet day of preparation for school. At least that’s what I like to think. I basically stayed in bed for hours and hours and then at 3:30 left my flat to go for lunch somewhere. I eventually figured out what to do in my lessons at about, oh, 10:30pm…
And thus started the craziest week yet. The social life got put away and the previous month’s frivolity were forgotten. Everyday at elementary school I taught 4 or five lessons until 4pm. On Monday, Tuesday and Thursday I went to Junior high at 4pm to help the students rehearse for speech contest. On Wednesday I was stuck in school in the mountains with no means of escape (I should have paid more attention to McGyver). At 6 o’clock on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday I had dance practice from 6 to 7 pm and on Tuesday from 7:30 till 9 I had English Conversation class. The only break I had was on Tuesday night when I watched a Japanese cartoon film (English title: “Castles in the Sky”) which was excellent. Except that the Castle in the sky was called Laputa which is Spanish for “whore”.
Well, on Friday I was lucky enough to cadge an early lift home and got the bus to Okayama for a wild night with Johanna and Fiona. Except by the time we got there we were a) very annoyed for being told off on the bus for being too noisy (we were told at the end of the journey by which time there was nothing we could do) and b) we were stupidly tired. So we went to a nice, new bar and had a few drinks and went home to watch a DVD.
On Saturday I met Chad and we went to see Mr Miyoshi, the crazy dentist in Chad’s old Hiroshima town. It was a great night. Mrs Miyoshi is an excellent cook and Mr Miyoshi loves booze, and loves even more giving booze to people. We started drinking at 5pm. By seven thirty, having drunk 5 types of alcohol, I was in a very bad way. By 9:30 I was laughing at nothing and struggling to stay upright. By 10:30 we were in bed. Fortunately (and surprisingly) I was hangover free on Sunday and managed to continue to assist in aiding Japan’s financial recovery by actioning a massive surge in spending in Okayama city. I wasn’t doing it for me, I was doing it for the people of Japan.
Well, yesterday was my first day back in Junior high. Back to lesson free days- almost. Speech contest is on Wednesday, so all free time is taken up practicing for that, and then practicing for the dance on Sunday. And then the social whirl had better restart or this is going to get rather dry...
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