How to get out of school lunches

I don't know why I didn't think of it before, but it really is the easiest solution. After explaining to the dinner lady at one of my schools that bacon is meat EVERY VISIT for the last year (that's 3 times a month). yesterday she presented me with a tray of food, declaring it was all OK. One of the day's selections was the most un-Spanish Spanish omelette I have seen in many a year, and there were maybe 8 little nubs of sausage sticking out of the top. I asked her, in Japanese, "what is that?", knowing full well that the answer would be bollocks. "Oh, it's wiener, that's not meat. It's OK". Bollocks. "Wiener comes from pig. It is meat", I continued, "and the soup?" "Oh, that's OK." "What's in it?" "Onion, potato, bacon, garlic..." "Bacon comes from pig. It is meat." "No it's not." "Yes it is. I cannot eat it." Then one of the other dinner ladies says that I am a vegetarian and that I cannot eat meat and that bacon and wiener are meat and the woman who I have explained it to maybe 3000 times says, "I don't understand." To quote Bridget Jones, "GAAAAAH!"

So I did the usual, ate lunch with the kids and picked out the meat, ate a little bit and then this time I started to feel rather unwell. 20 minutes later I was in the loo vomiting, not that anyone would have noticed. If I'd cut off my arm they'd probably still have sent the kids to get me for the next lesson.

So I told them I vomited and one lady was concerned. Another teacher I liked told me in English that to her it was funny. Ha ha. Not. The splashback alone from the Japanese style loo was more than horrible.

Anyway, no more school lunches at 3 of my schools, just 2 more to tackle, but I think that'll be problem free.

Vomiting is such a useful skill...